His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I will pee on everything he values.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
