Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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