tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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