So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
