I want to make a zoo with you.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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