So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize