dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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