if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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