her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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