Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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