So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I touched a dick in church today
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
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