You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
