um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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