I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
