bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
