she was so not down for the gang bang
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
i barfeds in our rink
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
