Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
