just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
