porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize