That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
