they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
