This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
