Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
it's like iHOP with fire
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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