Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize