if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I love having hate sex.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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