I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize