brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I would ride that face into the sunset
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
