i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
