Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize