I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
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