Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
