That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
