Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Boobs speak an international language.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
