Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
