used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
