dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
