you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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