pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Randomize
