He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize