week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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