I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
