I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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