people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
