This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
