VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
