Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
