we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize