ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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