Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
