whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize