So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
