drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
