he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
love makes seman taste better
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
